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10 October 2026

Some of the kindest things people do for us never become stories.

A person remembers that you have been unwell and calls a few days later. Someone notices that you are unusually quiet and stays beside you without demanding an explanation. An old acquaintance remembers a small detail you mentioned months ago, something you had almost forgotten saying.

These things are easy to underestimate.

We tend to remember the dramatic occasions when somebody helped us through a difficult time. Yet there are other moments when a person does something thoughtful without knowing how much we needed it.

I sometimes think that the finest test of a relationship is not what happens when life falls apart. It is what happens on an ordinary day, when there is no crisis, no occasion and no particular reason to make an effort.

Does someone still think of you? Do you still think of someone else?

As the years pass, we become better at recognising the difference between attention and affection. Attention wants to be noticed. Affection is often content simply to be useful, to be present, or to make another person’s day a little easier.

I remember that the smallest gestures can stay with us for years, sometimes long after we have forgotten the conversations that surrounded them.

Perhaps we should tell people when their kindness matters. We often assume they know. They may not.

And one day, when we look back, we might discover that the people who made life bearable were not always the ones who did the biggest things. Some were simply there, quietly, when we needed them.

Rajat Chandra Sarmah, Guwahati, Assam, India, Instagram @rajatchandrasarmah, YouTube: conversewithasmile, email rajatchandrasarmah@gmail.com